I tried so many times…I can’t do this anymore.

I’m hollow inside and I’m still giving her chances.

I’m lost and confused.

I’m beyond help…

She texted me out of nowhere today just to tell me she loved me.

I almost cried. She’s so amazing.

Let’s just say that if this is a dream…I don’t want to wake up ever.

Keep me in this coma!

I told her one of the few things I like about myself is the fact that I’m different from everyone else. I’m not a dick when it’s important that I shouldn’t be.

After she said “One of the only things I like about myself…is you.”

I cried….

Baby when you’re with me,

nothing can go wrong.

And even though I hate myself,

you make me feel like I belong.

That’s all I got so far but I think “I love you” is a good way to finish it…

So after 14 years I finally ask out the one person who has cared about me no matter what…but I picked a horrible time. She just broke up with her boyfriend, but she only did it because he had to move. And she’s cared about me so long she still said yes to me anyway. I rushed her into something and I’m scared I’m going to hurt her. We went out for a week and after me asking for a few days if she needed time she finally gave in. We’re taking a break until she can pull herself together. It’s a little upsetting, but if she needs time then I fully understand. I’m willing to wait however long it takes.

I may sound like a lovestruck teen, but after all this time I finally realized I love her. She loves me too. I would give almost anything to make her feel better and be with her. She told me not to promise her “forever.” I told her I wouldn’t because I won’t make promises I can’t keep. However I did promise her I would wait as long as it takes. I wouldn’t break that promise to save my own life.

I love you, Amber.